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Thursday, April 26, 2007

it's just insane. i've mix feelings of my poly life. am i meant to be a poly student? why am i asking myself this? i'm happy with my new friends. i think i like the subjects. but why am i feeling stressed out? perhaps it's me who makes myself freak out. i think those unnecessary. no, they are necessary. body image. i must make myself thin. who wants to hire a fat nurse? why do i feel fat when my bmi is in healthy range? but it's almost to borderline overweight though. so that means i'm about to get fat. seriously. it seems like every girl i see is either slim or skinny. and i feel that i'm the fattest girl in my course. but i look happy. Allah, what is wrong with me? i also keep thinking about money. and i have the strong urge to work part-time. however, my mum discourages me. she wants me to focus on my studies. but where the hell can i get more money if i don't work? i need to buy more clothes and pay my phone bill. what about my psorisis? i hate that. it keeps coming and it's such a nuisance. why must i have it? i keep thinking of it that i can't focus on my studies. i feel stupid. as i've mentioned i can't focus on my studies. i seem to be slacking. there're lots to study and 2 projects due and tests are like on next month. man, i feel stupid.

Allah, now i feel i'm not a grateful person. for goodness sake, there are others who suffer so, so ,so much pain than me. and here i am complaining while there're others suffering greatly. Ya Allah, please guide me to the right path. astaghfirullah...

and do relax, rabiah.

rabiah♥12:00 AM







myself


rabiah binte abdullah ربيعة
libra 30-09-1990
rabiah_libra90@hotmail.com

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