Thursday, December 31, 2009
today marks the last day of 2009. ain't it so fast. it's such a cliche how one keeps saying time flies. i'm not sure if the time really passes that fast or we do not spend the time meaningfully. perhaps we've so many things to do that we fail to spend our precious time qualityly(is there such word? hee). or maybe we do not have proper time management. whatever it is, tmr is already a new year. oh, i forgot to wish all the muslims salam muharram(which occurred on the 18th of dec). it's also a new year for the muslims. even though sadly, there're muslims who forgot it. perhaps the most significant month they remember in the islamic calendar is syawal. haiz.yesterday, finally, i met up with athena, sheereen and suxin. it's quite a disappointment that kartik couldn't make it on the last min and broy was down with fever. hope you'll get well soon. i've to admit i really miss my sec sch friends. i miss my sec sch days a lot. haha. we were so loud in class that we thought we're the outcasts in the class. we had so much time and energy that we did a lot of crazy things. i couldn't remember how many dvds suxin had rented. i miss our randomness. i don't know. i think i felt...happy:) haha. it's not that my life is so sad. hmm. it's just different:) only after i start working(not exactly though. it's just attachment. but still.), did i appreciate my sch days. a lot. so students, please enjoy your sch days. study smart and hard but don't forget to play as well. but don't play too much or you'll regret it, like me. haha.
i still have the pics!
life is about creating yourself. ok, but unfortunately, i've no idea what kind of person i am. i can think of many negative sides of me but somehow, i can't find my positive sides. erm, am i that negative? haa. i really don't know what i want to do. it's bad enough that i'm still pondering if nursing is what i want as a career. it's very bad enough that i'm not sure if i would like to continue nursing after the 3 years bond. wth. i'm still having that love-hate relationship with nursing. i do have a dream to pursue my studies in nursing in the uni. honestly, i envy my friends who are currently studying in the uni. i feel...very stupid. frankly, i can't help feeling i'm like the one who's left behind. alone. haiz. when i was asked if i would like to take a degree, i felt... i don't know. i really would love to study in the uni. but i need money to go there. i can take up a scholarship but i feel i'm not up to it. and what about my family? somehow, i feel my family depends on me. bapak doesn't earn much. that's why i'm very grateful that i'm going to work soon so i can help my family. even my sponsorship money has already eased his burden a lot. i hate it. i hate it that i don't know what i want to do:( pardon me for my thoughts.
urgh. damn it. who the hell am i?!
on the lighter note, congrats to safiah for passing the interview for nitec in nursing. i believe she can make it. welcome to the nursing profession! hehe. btw, i should praise ite simei. the building is very nice. even nicer than polytechnics. haha. ok, now i'm very worried for sa'adah. i really, really hope she will do well for her os so that she can go to her dream course. pls, pls, pls. and abdul rahman is starting his schs next week! i'm very, very, very happy when my siblings are making progressions:) in spite of the frequent squabbles and the fact that i'm extremely worried for abdul rahman, i love my siblings very much <3
rabiah♥11:23 AM
