Sunday, April 04, 2010
omg, i can't believe i'm going to officially work tmr. ie, i'm an official rn tmr. ie, i'm no longer a nursing student. ie, i've to start to get serious in life. seriously, i'm not as serious as what most ppl assume me as. ask me, what have i done for this so-not-long break? enjoyed myself to the max. really. meaning, i totally, really totally put aside my nursing stuff. and now, frankly, i'm feeling extremely panicky, totally knowing that i'm so not ready at all to work. Allah, pls, pls, pls help me. but then, God won't change one's life unless one changes him/herself. duh. man, i'm so damn screwed up:( i really wanna be a good nurse. and someone who's ambitious and has goals and dreams in life and would like to fulfill them. i want sth in my life. being a sn for all my life is so...mundane. no way. i don't want only that. i want sth more. i want to have a really bright future. but i may not able to get these if i don't change myself. urgh! damn, why do i keep having negativities pulling me? and why am i not strong enough?
ok, shut up, rabiah. btw, why didn't imran ajmain win for the best album award for the anugerahhitz just now? i really love his songs in spite of the fact, i do consider at times that his voice can be a pain to my ears. somehow, i feel like taufik is the singapore's version of siti. whatever. haa. and apparently, saádah is bawling her heart out to just learn that dbsk may split for temporary. ok, i exaggerated on the bawling part. but it's kinda sad that dbsk may disband. even though i'm not a k-pop crazy fan(ehem, like my sis), i do listen to korean songs and like that band. the members can really sing. haiz. as usual, the music and entertainment industry never fails to surprise us. anyway, lately, i've been watching the malay old black-and-white classics and hindi movies. gosh, the dashing, macho, romantic late nordin ahmad never fails me not to drool over him. haha. and how i wish i can be pretty and sweet-looking as latifah omar. i don't know why i can still laugh watching the old comedies like bujang lapok or labu labi even though it's obviously not my first time watching them. i love these malay classics even though unfortunately, the malay movie industry eventually came to a downfall. haiz. and i miss the old bollywood love stories. ya, i do admit that the currrent hindi movies are different than last time's and much better. not so typical and it's not only about love between a couple and how this poor couple has to overcome ordeals here and there, esp when the parents cannot accept their relationship, to conquer their love. haha. but i miss listening to the 90s' love songs although they can be very lengthy. seriously, it can go as long as 10mins! haha. haiz. that's what i think life is. things will always change. and we've to adapt to the changes or we'll be left alone in a corner, getting dusty as time goes by... oh, anyway, i've been watching makan expose quite religiously. haa. it's really interesting to see how ibrahim sawifi tries to discover the origins of the malay supposedly traditional foods. i think i'm going to miss being a couch potato at home. btw, i got tricked by the info from this website. i usually read this bollywood web(i know i've got nothing to do;P) and on the 1st of april, i read that bipasha and john abraham have split up. to my shock. cause i think they're like the longest very compatible couple in bollywood. and i like them together. they still stay strong despite the hoos and haas. ok, i know my eng vocab sucks. only after i read the whole article did i realize that it's actually an april's fool article. haha. nice one though.
hmm. the complete circle line is coming up. finally, there's an easier route from home to the stadium although i doubt i'll go there always. haa. but i hope that the lta is not going to totally make the 'cross country' bus journeys a history. i kinda love the long journeys even though i did puke once in a while. seriously, try to take bus 51 from hougang to jurong east. it's a really damn long ride. haha. or bus 80 from hougang to harbour front. ya, but then, there's nel which only take ard 25mins. taking the mrt is definitely much faster. however, to do the transfers, avoid the crowds and get a seat in the train can be quite a hassle. there're several times i'd to miss at most 2 trains when i got back from work in the pm shift due to overcrowding. taking the bus is more direct and usually a one-way ride despite the time consumption. being stuck in traffic jams is a torture. believe me. and esp when you're late. haha. well, it depends though at the occassions. if one is in a rush, the mrt is a quicker ride. i did remember the times i thought i'd be late so i took the nel, circle and red lines to work and the duration was only ard 30mins. the transfers part can be quite troublesome. but then, compared to my preferable 153 ride to toa payoh and take train to novena which takes ard 50mins. hmm. it still depends on the situation. well, i just hope the transporting system will improve for the better and the passengers have a good experienced ride to their destinations. hee.
as i've stated that i really enjoyed my break, i really did. i'm going to miss going to abdul rahman's sch almost every day. on each day, i'll gain knowledge how to teach my brother and learn new things about him as well as see improvements in him even though those may seem small to others. i totally love spending a lot of my time with my family and cousins♥ it's quite a disappoitnment that i'm unable to ctach up with my sec sch friends. they seem to be very busy. just read athena's blog. keep it strong, dear. i've got to understand it's not easy being a uni student. but how i wish i'll be one one day. i hope i'll meet them soon. well, for now, i'll just wish all the best for them:)
it's sad, you know, that you thought you have known someone well but actually, you don't. at all. i'm scared. i fear that i can't face the unpredictable world outside. i don't know. if i can't even handle the ppl i know, then what about those i barely know?
“Life is full of beauty. Notice it. Notice the bumble bee, the small child,
and the smiling faces. Smell the rain, and feel the wind.
Live your life to the fullest potential, and fight for your dreams.”
Ashley Smith
rabiah♥1:15 AM
